A Zen Buddhist and a Christian mystic walk into a bar…
Zen & Christianity: not as separate as they seem
In 2012, Christianity lost one of its biggest fans—for the time being. It was a shame, too, because I loved everything about Christianity—the vast reverberant spaces, the silence and solemnity, flowers and candles carefully placed on an altar, and a quiet, reflective prayer before going to bed. Losing my faith marked my swift transition from a quiet, thoughtful kid who loved God to an anxious, insecure young man.
Throughout college, I fumbled my way through my new materialism, reaching for whatever products and worldviews might fill the hole Christianity had left. Nothing really worked. Eventually, I sought out therapy, where the therapist recommended something so far from Christianity that I’ve only recently started to realize the connection: meditation.
All of a sudden, I could be that still, reflective kid again. Meditation brought me an inner peace, clarity, and kindness that I would not have thought possible. And so, out of gratitude to the people who had brought it to me, I dove headfirst into Buddhism and found myself able to re-engage in the things that brought me so much pleasure out of Christianity: the ritual, the contemplation, and a newly embodied and visceral conviction that life was mysterious, purposeful, and worth living.
And then something weird happened. I started to seek out Christianity again. I read Christian mysticism and was surprised to discover the level of overlap with Buddhism. I started to talk to my Christian family members about their own faith in a direct and life-affirming way that they didn't hear at their own churches. How could it be that by practicing a different faith, I somehow had new access to the faith I had left as a child?
As I see it, the through-line between Zen and Christianity is non-duality. Non-duality is far beyond the scope of this piece, but at its core, it says that the apparent separation we make in the world between, for example, self and other, mine and yours, even true, false, good, and evil, are not ultimate distinctions. This isn’t just a verbal party trick. The more a person comes to experience non-duality, the greater the sense of interconnectedness, empathy, and sheer wonder she feels at existing.
Non-duality is very explicitly at the core of Zen but is found all over Christian mysticism as well. Both say that if you want to know God or the ineffable directly, just be silent and still.
I've practiced this silent stillness for half a decade now, and although I hope the coming decades will bring even subtler insight, I can confidently say that God is with me wherever I go, and I can confidently say that he's with you as well. His spirit flows through the leaves of trees as they shake in the wind. He's there in the eyes of friend, foe, and stranger encountered on a daily walk. He's there in the night sky, in the rays of the sun, even in the oil spills and nuclear disasters. There is no place God's love does not reach.
I promise I didn't write this piece to convert you to Zen, or to Christianity, or to anything. But I did write it in the spirit of, and in support of, good faith, which is another word for sincerity. In our age of disconnection, it's a small miracle for anyone to have good faith in anything.
So if I were to give you any piece of advice, I'd recommend finding the part of yourself that is silent and still. You might find that it opens you up to everything. Also, find others who are practicing anything in good faith, whether that's religion, service work, or a bowling league. To be connected to others and doing good work is the greatest joy we could have.
Appendix: How to See God
In my opinion, the most direct path to non-dual experience is to practice being silent and still. You could call it meditation, or prayer, or contemplation, but I recommend practicing it every day. Set aside a time and space to just do the practice, but carry the silent stillness with you everywhere.
From a Christian perspective, I like Centering Prayer. You could also consult the works of Thomas Merton, Richard Rohr, Thomas Keating, or the book The Cloud of Unknowing.
From a Zen perspective, I like shikantaza, which I wrote about here. Shikantaza is closely related to the more general practice of choiceless awareness, which crops up in countless traditions. For reading, you might like Brad Warner’s There is No God and He Is Always With You.
For more on non-duality, you might enjoy the work of Rupert Spira, Michael Taft, and countless others.
Reach out at reymbarcelo@gmail.com if you’d like to learn more about any of this. I love to help!